Trying to think about what I wanted to write for my next blog post was a struggle to say the least. For me, it has always been hard to make any small or big decision in my life. I had a few ideas for what I wanted to write about but I just wasn’t feeling as excited about those ideas. After class today I was talking with my mom about all the things in life that were going wrong and not knowing what to do with the curve balls being thrown my way. That is when the light clicked on in my mind and I decided I could write about something that a lot of my friends and peers are especially struggling with right now. Making important life decisions.
A few weeks ago my best friend Lauren (who you will hear a lot about) and I were just hanging out watching American Horror Story. We got on the subject of being so confused about God’s plans for us and the plans we have made for ourselves. You start off college, aka our first step into the real world, having to know what you want to be, where you want to live, what friends you want to make time for, what summer job you should work at, basically just a bunch of decisions that set you up for the future. Lauren and I were getting so upset. We both realized recently that we don’t know exactly what we want anymore. And not necessarily with school, but just life in general. Were both so young still, but it feels like were running out of time. We talked a lot about how we thought we knew what we wanted but then later realizing that the thing we thought we wanted maybe wasn’t for us. These are the “curve balls” in life. Sure I still want to be a nurse living in Colorado in 4 years, but what if I can’t do that right away? What if God has a different plan for me? Something I haven’t set my mind to like I have with living in Colorado… A few days after Lauren and I had our conversation, she texted me saying, “Quit your job and lets run away together this summer”. I called her after that and we talked on the phone for a half hour dreaming of traveling through Europe for a few weeks together this summer, and visiting friends from far away. How great would it be to just get away for awhile and have fun? We’re always pretty serious about these kind of conversations (which is rare with Lauren) but we always know it would be a long shot to actually live out some of our dreams.
Which brings up another great topic! Why do our dreams have to be a long shot? As young college students we are told by everyone to make decisions about our future, save money so you don’t have as many student loans once you graduate, work a bunch so you make as much money as you can, and we’re asked where we will be in 10 years. But also as young college students, this is the time to explore the world and figure out who you are as a person. I personally think traveling is the best way to learn more about yourself. College is the time where you are on your own, not yet married, and you can just explore and really find out what you want in life. My church mentor and role model, Steph Bauer, told me one day while on one of our many coffee dates that she studied abroad a bunch in college and with that having wayyy more loans and student debt to have to pay back. But she said something that has stuck with me since then and was similar to what I said above. It was along the lines of, “you’re young and unafraid so go out and spend a lot of money exploring the world. You will learn so much about yourself and it will forever change who you are”. Thank you Steph for always saying the right things to me.
P.S. I told you I would ramble a lot!
With all of that, I recently decided to study abroad fall 2016 in Bergen Norway. I took Steph's advice and I am going to get my mind off the things that may not being going as well I had planned. I am going to travel a bunch and have fun while I am young and have this amazing opportunity. I wouldn't say I am running away from my problems, I'm just taking and break from worrying about them 24/7 and going somewhere where I can learn more than any person or textbook will ever teach me. Sometimes its hard to decide what the best decision is for you. I'm nervous to do this by myself, I'm excited to travel all through Europe, and I don't know what will happen or how it will go. But I am willing to take the chance.
"Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble" -Proverbs 3:23